That moment when you realize your client has no idea what you’re talking about, but that revelation has yet to hit them! ~eDee-ism
Things you can’t say to a client:
1) Keep talking, I charge by the hour.
2) I would love to explain server structure to you. I charge $35 an hour, it’s a 3 month course also offered at the local community college.
3) a. Sorry, I can’t make white – Whiter. It’s white, it already lacks all color
b. Black text on a black background is invisible.
4) Please don’t say the word “Database” again, clearly you have no idea what it means.
5) The way you’re going it would be cheaper to put me on the payroll.
6) Please stop talking so I can fix this and make your life happy again.
7) I know ‘they’ say never write it down, but how do you think I remember your password?
8) Every term used incorrectly tells the programmer they can charge you more [I never would, but I‘d LOVE to say it.]
9) Yes, I work from home. No, that doesn’t make it a hobby.
10) OH MY GOSH! Please let me fix your site, it’s terrible!
Things I do say to clients:
1) I update your site at no charge. If you update your site, I charge $35 an hour. (this is only understood after they screw up the update)
2) Never touch that.
3) Search Engine Optimization does not replace Marketing.